With one day to go, I am no going to win NaNoWriMo. Though I am disappointed that I didn't complete the allocated wordcount, I am not going to mope around the house like I did in 2005. Instead, I am going to consider what I did achieve, which is a lot more than I have done in recent time.
I have worked on my plotting skills, character development and world creation. I have created tools that will help with the creation of fiction in not-so-distant future. I have also seen how disruptive some of my habits are for my overall progress. So, all in all, NaNoWriMo has been a steep relearning of skills rusty from plenty of online gaming.
I have decided to participate in NaBloPoMo in December. This means that I have to post a blog entry every day. I was thinking of doing reviews of a bunch of stuff, including software and movies. I'll probably throw in music reviews as well. This will be more than enough content to keep the peeps following the blog entertained. If you have some recommendations then send them this way.
Writing a novel is time-consuming, tiresome and can be emotionally sapping. It is not for the feint of heart. You have to push through your own negativity, to stand tall and proud, as you dare to breath life into your characters and to the story. Finishing a novel takes a lots of grit and determination and bravery.
I've been struggling to write a novel for a few years now, but I lack discipline as a writer, which leaves me feeling empty and lacking the tools necessary to tone down those voices in my head. It tends to make me feel empty because I never have the feeling of completion that an author achieves upon finishing that first draft. And if you don't finish that first draft, how are you going to move to stages beyond that?
But why is NaNoWriMo so important to me? Its fairly simple. I want to complete something rather than wallow in my own self-doubt and insecurity. I want to rise above this wall and accept the challenge set before me. I want to succeed in the task set before me because I don't want to live all my life afraid to take a chance. But I don't see NaNoWriMo as the be-all and end-all. If I don't make it this year I will still write, and I will try again next year. NaNoWriMo is not a cure-all, but it can be used as a tool, and I intend to use it.
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